It should be clear that I've never regarded this amorphous group of
people linked together by the small island where they were born as anything
other than kind, patient, and open.
No. Let me clear that up. I don't look at the "Taiwanese" as
anything, just as I don't Americans. I know plenty of people from plenty of
countries, some of which are among the most spectacular people I've ever
met, while others (a much smaller group) I hope not to come in contact with
ever again.
That said, I do look at the general disposition of the people I see everyday
in a different light after a friend of ours, Luna, came to visit last week
from Korea. She's another friend of Fanfan and mine from when we studied in
Angers, France, with whom we've kept it very close contact.
She came to visit with her French boyfriend, Julien. They didn't arrive
together, arriving from the irrespective countries, since she's finishing
her studies in Korea, and he's working for Orange
in gay Pah-ree.
Their relationship, while quite different from ours in many respect, is
similar in the sense that they have to spend quite long periods of time
apart, on different continents. Lucky for them, Julien's job requires him to
fly to Asian countries fairly frequently, so they've gotten to see each
other every once in a while. Luna has also returned to France to study in
Lyon, and she will be going back next fall to start a master's program in
Paris.
The major difference, though, between the two couples is that Luna's family
is not at all supportive of her relationship with Julien. In fact, only her
mother and sister even know that she has a foreign boyfriend, and they think
it is a big mistake.
To be fair, this doesn't really reflect any outright anti-foreigner
sentiment in her family. My own parents, who think Fanfan is wonderful, fear
that I may be getting myself into a relationship that could easily become
more than I can handle -- from a pragmatic point of view.
Hell, even I worry about it.
What I came to see during Luna's time here, though, was that in Korea, these
sort of feelings may be more rooted in tradition and, to some extent,
xenophobia than in practical worries. Before Luna and Julien came, I new
quite well that Luna's family felt the way they did, and I knew that part of
it was due to a belief that she should find a Korean man. Yet, I didn't
expect to here her praising the Taiwanese the way she did. She was almost
awstruck by the way foreigners weren't stared down here. They way it didn't
seem to be a big deal to pass a Westerner on the street.
Sure, I've heard instances of people being yelled at by old Taiwanese men
about the fact that there's too many foreingers here or something, but not
only do I believe that those instances are few and far between, I've never
experienced anything close to that
myself. Of course, people look at me. I'm tall. I have red hair and,
depending on how long it's been since I groomed myself, a full, even redder
beard. These looks, though, are never glares. I don't get stared down by
people. Little kids, often, are first shocked to see me then almost giddy
with interest in me.
Recently, I had two little boys in the grocery trying to talk to me,
regardless of how many times I told them that I didn't understand and that I
didn't speak Chinese. They kept asking me questions. While grading papers
and waiting for the MRT to arrive a couple of weeks ago, I felt someone's
hand brush up and down my arm and looked down to find a little, old lady
grinning from ear to ear at me. She giggled and said, "Mao, mao,"
(hair, or hairy) as she waved and trotted away.
Not to mention the fact that I still get random people telling me how handsome
I am.
When I mentioned these sort of things to Luna, she said she couldn't have
imagined these sort of things happening to people living in Seoul. The idea
of Fanfan's family being not only accepting but supportive of her
relationship with me was astounding to her. Fanfan said that when she told
her parent's that I was coming to Taiwan and they offered to let me live
with them, she asked, "Won't the neighbors start to talk?" Her mom
laughed and said, "Fanfan, don't you know? This is the 21st
century!"
I've never been to Korea. I'm not going to base my impressions of an entire
nation on one person's account, but I do trust what Luna tells me to be her
honest impressions of the place she comes from. I would be very interested
to know what people think of this. I wonder if Taiwan really is more open
than other countries here in Asia regarding foreigners.
1 comments:
I think Taiwan's pretty open, at least compared with the rest of East Asia. I've had numerous friends tell me horror stories about Korea, though